The Manx Den

my girlfriend broke up with me and sent me pix of her and her new boyfriend in bed
ouch.
yeah.i sent them to her dad

So I started work today at Cox Communications.
Direct quote from Cox Communications, mission statement.
“For Cox, it’s not about being the biggest; it’s about being the best.”
…I feel a t-shirt coming on.

< +Spazz> Oh, man. I feel bad now.
< +Spazz> I thought my cat had a scab on its belly.
< +Spazz> So I’ve been picking at it.
< +Spazz> Turns out, it’s his nipple. X.x

GUYS, STORY TIME
So my teacher’s friend’s friend or something
She was dogsitting one day
Shows up the first time, finds the dog dead on the floor, right?
how embarrassing
SO she’s gotta pack the dog corpse up and take it to the vet so they can dispose of it or whatever
She can’t find anything to fit it in, so she stuffs it in a freaking SUITCASE
She didn’t have a car so she has to take the train through Chicago
oh mannnn
This guy helps her carry the case on and is like
“this is pretty heavy, what’s in it?”
lady replies “just some computer things”
the guy SOCKS HER IN THE FACE AND RUNS OFF WITH THE CASE
AHAHAHA HOW would you pawn that sort of thing???

Kami: if you changed your name to Kame, you would have a much more interesting name
Dark_Fox: And if you changed yours to Dark_Fax, you’d have a more communicative name.
* Dark_Fox is now known as Dark_Fax
It’d be… ‘telecommunicative.’
* Dark_Fax makes noises and bitches because he’s out of paper ant toner *
Oh god, that happened at work today.
FEED MEE!!!
Nuuuuuuuu
* Dark_Fax displays wrong time *
* Dark_Fax rings for no reason *
* Kami is now known as VCR-clock
* Dark_Fax gets a paper jam *
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
PAPPPERRRRR
* VCR-clock blinks
TOOOOOONEEERRRR
* VCR-clock blinks
* Dark_Fax breaks a bearing and bounces around on the counter *
FEEEED ERROORRR!!!! NEED PAPER!!
* Dark_Fax rings again for no reason *
* VCR-clock blinks some more
* SailorV runs and hides becuz there are weirdo’s in here
* Dark_Fax chases SailorV * MY PAPER!!! MY PREEESCIOUUUS!!
* VCR-clock blinks
* VCR-clock blinks
EEEE!
* SailorV unplugs the VCR
* VCR-clock has quit IRC
* Dark_Fax is now known as Dark_Fox
ok i think ive peaked the humor of that

Yikes: Someone sneaked into Rob’s back yard and PLANTED A TREE this morning
chunkyq: WHAT?
Yikes: Like, a seven-foot deciduous sapling. That’s the BEST act of vandalism EVER

I helped the EMTs at a car wreck and got blood all over my arms and shirt. It looked like I murdered 20 people with a fork… anyway, I walked into a convieniance store down the street and said my girlfriend needs a tampon. The guy at the counter was mortified.

Answering Machine: Did you ever hear one of those corny, positive messages on someone’s answering machine? “Hi, It’s a great day and I’m out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is ‘Share the love.’” Beep.” “Uh, yeah…this is the VD clinic calling…Speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love” Radio interview quote from Marine Corps General Reinwald and a female radio host. He wants to host some boy scouts at the training center for some practise excercises. As follows
: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?
: We’re going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting.
: Shooting! That’s a bit irresponsible, isn’t it?
: I don’t see why, they’ll be properly supervised on the rifle range.
: Don’t you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?
: I don’t see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.
: But you’re equipping them to become violent killers.
: Well, you’re equipped to be a prostitute, but you’re not one, are you?
The radio went silent and the interview ended. You gotta love the Marines!

< @David> Yay I get laid today! Been a month…. needing it by now
< @Sony> ………..
< @Sony> TMI TMI TMI
< @David> Only a few hundred pounds but its better than nothing
Thanks for the info
< @David> eh?
< @David> damn i meant PAID
< @David> I get PAID today
< @David> dammit

so i saw this number plate on some ricer car today… YAG-108
except i saw it in my rear view mirror, so it looked like BOI-GAY
i nearly hit the car in front from laughing so hard :/

q c12sd4r5tf`1 vb`1qqaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaws
q c12sd4r5tf`1 vb`1qqaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaws
q c12sd4r5tf`1 vb`1qqaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaws
‘|
;’/.|
;’/.|
|ujhy32′/.|
?/’}||}”?;.?
..And so ends lesson 1 of : “how to clean the keyboard while on IRC”

my stomach is undergoing disasters unnamed at the moment
but you can’t say no to the grandparents
Yeah…
Who can resist a nice, juicy plate of grandparents.